What to write in a condolence message or death notice
Reading: 2 min · Updated: 2026-08-21
When someone dies, almost nobody knows what to write. You do not need the perfect sentence. You need a short, honest one. Here is how to build it, with examples you can use as they are.
A death notice has three parts
That is genuinely enough, in this order: who died and when, when and where the farewell takes place, and who is announcing it.
- With deep sorrow we announce that our mother, Mary Novak, passed away on 14 March 2026 at the age of 78.
- The funeral service will be held on Saturday 16 March at 11 a.m. at St Michael's church.
- Her husband, children and grandchildren.
Sentences for a sympathy card
Keep it short. Two lines that sound like you are worth more than a paragraph copied from the internet. If you knew the person, say something specific about them. That is the part the family rereads years later.
- I am so sorry for your loss. Your mother always had a kind word for me.
- There are no words for this. I am here for whatever you need, today and in a month.
- May he rest in peace. I still remember him teaching us patience in his workshop.
- I am thinking of your family. He was a good man and it showed in small things.
- May her memory be a blessing.
What not to write
Avoid sentences that explain the death or hurry the grief along: "it was his time", "at least she is not suffering", "you have to be strong". A grieving person does not need an explanation, they need company. And if you do not know what to say, say that: "I don't know what to say, but I am here" is one of the most appreciated sentences there is.
If you cannot be there
Families live scattered across countries and not everyone makes it to the funeral. Writing down a memory and leaving it where the family will read it does count as being there. An online memorial is made for exactly that: everyone adds their message from wherever they are, and the family reads them together.
It takes a few minutes and costs nothing.